Monday 14 February 2011

Whores of Mensa Press Roundup!




Sally, Girl Reporter says:
"Bored with Private Eye? The New York Times? That three volume biography of Picasso that's been trying the structural integrity of your nightstand? Well, you're in the right place!


Read all about Whores of Mensa contributor Ellen over at Matthew Badham's fab new blog, Overspill! (Here's a permalink, if that isn't working for ya.)


Don't miss this article on Mardou and her honey Ted May (along with some other luminaries of the fantastic St. Louie comix scene) on the St. Louis Riverfront Times site!


Check out this classic, in-depth (and quite richly illustrated) interview with Jeremy!"


Still not enough Whores press for you?








1: What is your earliest memory?
Rampaging through the garden with a pink squeaky rubber hammer.


2: Who was the first love of your life?
John Travolta in Grease. I used to lie awake at night trying to
calculate the age difference and working out when we could get married.
When I wasn't doing that I used to prance around pretending to be Olivia
Newton John by unhooking the straps of my nightie top and trying to be
sexy. It would be a matter for the social services these days,
probably.


3: What's the worst trouble you've been in?
Hmmm... well, I had a bit of a hairy moment once when I was sent to
review a really ghastly end-of-the-pier show featuring the Krankies and
Bucks Fizz for a national Sunday newspaper of some repute. One of the
crap acts was this guy called Christian, who was a horrendous local
cabaret singer in Glasgow in the 80s. Not being a native of Glasgow, I
had no idea who he was, and he was so covered in bright orange make up I
just figured he was a cut price Tom Jones impersonator and made lots of
jokes in print about his barbeque tan. It was only when he phoned up the
paper threatening to take them to court that I realized that underneath
all the day glo panstick he was mixed race, and I was basically the next
Jade Goody. Oops!


4: With which historical figure do you most identify with, and why?
I'm quite enamoured of those 1920s actresses with loose morals, like
Tallulah Bankhead and Clara Bow. Nobody gave a toss, everyone was
constantly pissed and riding around in cars the size of tanks, and the
outfits were amazing.


5: Who's your all time hero?
Courtney Love circa 1992.


6: Which song best describes you?
On a good day - She Belongs To Me by Bob Dylan for the line: 'She's got
everything she needs, she's an artist, she don't look back.' On a bad
day - Dude Looks Like A Lady.


7: What are you reading right now?
Doctors and Nurses by Lucy Ellmann - it's amazing, an incredible comic
rant about the state of the NHS. It's truly original and angry, full of
capital letters and exclamation marks and references to CUNTS. It's so
refreshing to see the word CUNT in print, especially in capital letters.


8: Which book do you wish you'd written?
Slaves Of New York by Tama Janowitz.


9: If you were stranded on a desert island who would you choose to be
your Boy Friday? Elaborate!
Jack White. He'd be good with his hands and could probably whittle some
kind of ornamental gazebo out of twigs. In the evenings we could sing
songs around the fire and in the daytime his large packet would be very
handy for providing much needed shade.


10: What's your worst habit?
Being a stressed out bitch, picking my nose, not phoning people back.


11: Name a quality you cannot abide in others.
The misplaced self confidence of idiots.


12: Name an over-rated virtue.
Femininity.


13: What's the best advice you've ever been given?
Don't listen to anything anybody tells you unless it corresponds
directly with something you already decided to do.


14: Did your school teachers like you?
Some of them did, others didn't. My biology teacher wrote in a report
that I was cynical - when I was 12! But the art teacher loved me - too
bad he also 'loved' quite a lot of 14 year old girls - he got done for
feeling them up in the supply cupboard.


15: What would your motto be?
Work hard, eat lard!


16: Who've you met that's famous?
Ooh, let's see...I've met all the A-listers - Ann Maurice from House
Doctor, Colin and Justin the gay interior design duo, Carol Smillie...I
did once have a ridiculous night of 90s Britpop debauchery at the
Groucho club with Keith Allen, Alex from Blur and Damien Hirst, and
spent most of the night on a sofa with the comedian Rob Newman, who told
me my cartoons were sexy, then nicked my fags and fucked off. Ooh, and
I've stroked a Stroke -the hot one who went out with Drew Barrymore. I
touched the back of his leather jacket and then mysteriously got
pregnant a few weeks later. Co-incidence? I think not...


17: Who would play you in the movie of your life?
Kate Winslet after a lot of chips and cake. Or Victoria Wood.


18: Got any good scars?
I've got a large iron burn on my arm - proof, if needed, that ironing is
shit.


19: Do you have a nemesis?
Nicola Pickwell, my arch enemy from primary school.


20: How would you like to die?
At the age of 97, sitting on the lap of a good looking italian boy with
high cheekbones.

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